No one plans for their marriage to end in divorce. It’s a tough time for everyone and emotions can run high. It is often difficult to keep those emotions in check. Sadly, sometimes this results in violence. To be sensitive throughout the process for the good of everyone involved is easier said than done. Here are some actions that you can take to prevent violence in divorce.
Be careful about your conversations
It’s best to work together to end the marriage peacefully. Try to avoid heated conversations with your soon-to-be-former spouse. If you can’t talk without getting emotional, end the conversation quickly. Take some time for both of you to cool off and try again another day. You can also have another person present during your conversations to help diffuse the situation. If these suggestions don’t work, you can always ask the court that you only through your legal counsel or a third-party website such as Our Family Wizard.
Speaking of conversation, I can’t stress enough how critical it is to keep divorce discussion off social media. Use another outlet to vent instead of posting it for the world to see. It prevents bad decisions that can embarrass you both, and it’s the law. Our standing orders now include a section that says, “no disparaging of the other party in the presence of a child or on social media”. This is the day and age where people post many events and experiences from their personal lives on the internet, but sensitive divorce topics are not appropriate for social media or other web publication.
Seek counseling throughout the divorce process
The acceptable time to vent is with a counselor. Counseling isn’t a requirement, but I strongly advise it. The courts order parenting classes in a divorce involving children to diffuse traumatic situations. They want to help the parties manage emotions arising from the divorce as effectively as possible. The best way to look out for your own emotional well-being is to hire a counselor for yourself and consider hiring one for your child or children. The emotions of a divorce or a custody dispute are difficult to deal with for most adults, let alone children. Often a counselor is the only safe place for a child to discuss the impact of divorce on their lives.
Consider a collaborative divorce
If you’re concerned about having an emotional divorce, we can explore different approaches to the divorce process. During a collaborative divorce, a mental health professional is a part of the collaborative team. By participating in the collaborative process, they know what’s going on with both parties in the divorce. They also have conversations or conferences with the divorcing parties separate from the rest of the collaborative team. During these “off-line” meetings, they can discuss any pressing emotional issues and try to resolve them.
Ultimately, the objective of a divorce is to dissolve the marriage. Most people want it done as quickly and peacefully as possible. It’s normal to experience unfamiliar emotions during divorce. I advise you to schedule counseling to work through these emotions. A counselor will help you move forward with a healthier state of mind which will hopefully avoid violence in divorce.
IF VIOLENCE DOES OCCUR, CALL THE POLICE IMMEDIATELY AND CONSIDER OBTAINING A PROTECTIVE ORDER FOR YOUR SAFETY AND THE SAFETY OF YOUR CHILDREN.
For More Information About How to Prevent Violence while going through a Divorce, Contact an Experienced Dallas Family Law Attorney.
To schedule a free initial consultation with an experienced Dallas Family Law Attorney, contact Paula Lock Smyth Law Offices at 214-420-1800.
Paula Lock Smyth has practiced law in Texas since 1985, focusing on Family Law, Probate, Mediation, and Collaborative Divorce. She is a trained mediator, seasoned litigator, and one of the early adopters of Collaborative Divorce in Texas. Paula is a member of the State Bar of Texas, the College of the State Bar and the Texas Bar Foundation and has served as Past President of Dallas Lawyers Concerned for Lawyers. She was a Master in the Annette Stewart Inn of Court and is a Charter Member of the Collaborative Law Institute of Texas. Her legal knowledge and decades of experience make her a trusted voice on matters that impact families across Dallas and surrounding counties.