Going through a divorce is a stressful process even if both spouses agree that a divorce is what they want. They both have fears about what their future will look like. These fears are compounded when they have children. Plus, children have their own fears when their parents are going through the divorce process.
Most Common Fears of Spouses and How Collaborative Divorce Helps
One of the most common fears is that a spouse will not get a fair settlement or fair division of the marital assets. If they have children, each spouse may fear that the best interest of the children will be overlooked.
In the collaborative divorce process, there are professionals that help guide the couple to making informed decisions that are acceptable to them both. A financial specialist helps them value their assets and work together for a fair settlement. Childcare specialists and mental health counselors help the couple make decisions that are best for the children.
Common Fears Children Have When Their Parents Are Divorcing
Children of all ages are stressed when their parents are going through a divorce. The collaborative divorce process with the ability of a mental health professional to be part of the collaborative team, helps the parents understand and relate to the fears of their children. Some common fears of children are:
- Who will I live with?
- Will I have to choose between my parents?
- Will we have to move?
- Will I go to the same school?
- Will I have to leave my friends?
- Will I still get to play soccer/go to dance class/take music lessons, etc.
How Parents Can Help Alleviate Their Children’s Fears
It may be difficult for parents to relate to their children when they themselves are also suffering emotionally but some suggestions are:
- Answer the children’s questions honestly.
- Do not disparage the other parent in front of the children.
- Do not use the children as messengers to take information to the other parent. Even if the message is neutral, it still puts the child in the middle of the parents and should be avoided.
- Decide to do a collaborative divorce so you and your ex can be good co-parents for your children.
For More Information About Divorce Contact an Experienced Dallas Family Law Attorney
To find out more about common divorce fears, and to schedule a free initial consultation with a Dallas Family Law Attorney, contact Paula Lock Smyth Law Offices at 214-420-1800.
Paula Lock Smyth has practiced law in Texas since 1985, focusing on Family Law, Probate, Mediation, and Collaborative Divorce. She is a trained mediator, seasoned litigator, and one of the early adopters of Collaborative Divorce in Texas. Paula is a member of the State Bar of Texas, the College of the State Bar and the Texas Bar Foundation and has served as Past President of Dallas Lawyers Concerned for Lawyers. She was a Master in the Annette Stewart Inn of Court and is a Charter Member of the Collaborative Law Institute of Texas. Her legal knowledge and decades of experience make her a trusted voice on matters that impact families across Dallas and surrounding counties.